Pull up a chair: Wendy Martin’s stone table invites connection in the Fan

Friday morning, a little bit after noon, Fan resident Candy McGuire was going for a delayed morning walk. Lucky for her, that meant a run-in with a lunch group she had only attended once before, an hour of lively conversation, and nine new friends.

In the front lawn of a cream colored house on the corner of North Mulberry and Grove sits a big blue stone table with at least ten chairs perched around. In front of it stands a sign: “Fridays at the Table” in big swirling font at the top, “All welcome, noon-ish / byo lunch” it reads beneath.

The table is the passion project of Fan resident Wendy Martin. The idea came to her after watching future mayor Danny Avula’s 2014 TEDxRVA talk, “Dependence isn’t a dirty word.” As Avula talked, Martin became energized. That spring, she sketched up a design, and her husband Todd built it. 

In 2016 Martin wrote a blog post about her experiences, and due to its popularity, was asked to give her own TEDxRVA talk on the subject. The talk was entitled The Community Table. Nine years later, the project is still going strong.

“My lived experience is that the true joy in life is found in connection—the gang of kids on my neighborhood block, my high school cross country team, the PTA at my kids' schools,” Martin said.

So Martin decided to bring this connection to her neighborhood, and front lawn. She perches at her table with water and friends, and offers an empty chair up to whoever walks past.

“The people that say ‘yes,’ they’re cool people,” Martin said. 

One of these people who said yes has become a close friend of Martin’s, and someone she sees all the time. Alison Farmer moved to Richmond from D.C. after the pandemic and was in search of community. She remembers passing the table and thinking about what it meant. Coincidentally, she ended up moving in a block away. 

“Her table brought me to Richmond,” Farmer joked as she ate her homemade lunch off her plate she had just walked over.

Martin’s sign is familiar to neighbors in the Fan. Many, like Farmer, have stopped by once or twice, others have thought about it. Martin acknowledges though that for some, taking that leap can be daunting.

“My life journey made me understand, really in a deep way, for the first time, that a lot of people have found more risk than benefit in connection. A lot of people have been hurt, or life has hurt them, or somebody else has hurt them. And what comes so naturally to me, to sit out here and say hi to everybody, that's such a gift. That's such a fortunate thing to do. So I have come to learn that being connected takes courage,” Martin said.

One of these neighbors who took the leap was painter Caroline Huggins. Huggins was walking by a couple of weeks ago when Martin called out to her and encouraged her to take a seat. While she was deciding whether or not to come back this week, Huggins got a text from Martin. Two weeks later Huggins returned with lunch and stories. She noticed in particular how special being able to walk and bump into a community was, having lived in Santa Fe before, a more driving-centric city.

“I was just so impressed that somebody had done that and said, Let's all sit down together. I don't know you, but let's all sit down," Huggins said. “She certainly knows how to connect. She sent me a few texts that afternoon or something. So I felt seen, and having just moved here, that was nice.”

Huggins immediately connected with Martin over their alma mater and time living in New York, and with a passerby over their shared hometown.

“It was just kind of this amazing crossroads of all different kinds of people with different things in common,” she said.

Conversations at the Stone Table span pets, dogs in tow, upcoming family events, past hometowns, careers, politics—the type of things you would talk about with your best friends. Martin also said the table has helped find jobs for some lunch-goers. 

Attendees described the table as a place for a more authentic and real form of networking.

Kim Chiarchiaro is a friend of Martin’s. Chiarchiaro and Martin met in another third space, the playground at their kid’s elementary school in the neighborhood.

“This table means reconnecting, yeah, with your community, like the people that you've known in the past. But then it's cool, because you also get to know new people, and then you never know what connections are going to come from that,” Chiarchiaro said. “ Like this woman who is a painter, Caroline, maybe I will buy one of her paintings one day, or I know of a place that's having an exhibit and we exchange information. You never know what's gonna happen.”

Sam McCoy, who lives in Brooklyn but was raised in Richmond, was visiting their mom for the weekend and suggested they meet at the Stone Table. 

“I came all the way from New York for this today,” McCoy joked.

McCoy said that while catching up from afar online is easy, it is no substitute for in-person connection.

“You realize when you connect in person how little you actually do know about what's going on in your friends and family's lives. So this is an opportunity to say, ‘OK, let's put the phone down. I see what you're posting and sharing by choice, but like, what's really going on?’” McCoy said.

The Stone Table has hosted dinners with family and friends, a surprise “Welcome to America” party for a couple new to the neighborhood from Vietnam, the Latvian Federation cyclists during their stay for the UCI Road World Championships, and remote workers seeking community during the COVID-19 pandemic. But most memorable to Martin is just when a stranger is walking past and they say “yes.”

“Every time somebody sizes up the situation and ultimately says, ‘Yeah. I'm gonna pull up a chair. I'm gonna take a chance on this.’ That's my favorite thing. It's magic, every time,” Martin said.

As the group was finishing up their meals a group of Richmonders walked past the table. “You wanna join us?” Wendy called out with enthusiasm and a smile.

“Next time, we’re there,” they called back.

Contact reporting intern Juliana Vandermark at jvandermark@richmonder.org.

Note: this article has been updated to reflect the correct material of the table, blue stone, and to add that Todd Martin constructed the table.